Does being scared of a kid’s birthday party sound ridiculous to you? Well, it should, unless of course, you’re a parent like me and have been exposed to this evil underground world! Only as a parent will you truly understand the fear, chaos, and general distress caused by our little evil monkeys. I’m saying this with love, of course.

Let me explain. Picture this situation: 32 kindergarteners in one room, pizza, sugar, balloons, and soccer balls. What do you think is going to happen? That’s right, pandemonium. That’s where I found myself this past weekend, while hosting a party for my youngest.

Cute kids smiling, having a good time, calmly appreciative of what the parents have coordinated. These are all things of imagination. Once you’re in the real world, it’s madness. Within 2 minutes of this horde of children storming into the playroom, kids were jumping on a stage, kicking things over, and generally being insane.

Do I exaggerate, of course, but this is still true for at least a portion of the little monsters. As the parent of one of the attendees, you can kind of just watch and giggle about it, and make sure your kid doesn’t get into trouble. However as one of the organizing parents, the stress is taken up to the extreme. You’re now responsible for providing some kind of order, some kind of enjoyment, and generally a successful party for the most fickle crowd possible.

I was more stressed out about this situation than I was with 150 guests at my own wedding. At least those guests were mostly adults who know how to conform to the expectations of society. These little birthday goers are still off the grid! How are we expected to deal with that? You can’t just yell at random people’s kids, um, right?

In the end, it’s like many other things you go through as a parent. You dread it, it’s chaotic and stressful, but when all of the tears and dust settle, there are some really nice memories made. That’s pretty much the story of our lives now. It’s all about looking past the current unenjoyable moment, and toward the future moment of reflection at what you were able to pull off, and at how happy your kid was in the middle of it all.